Correction

Of course, the day after my last post, J Frog decided to start crawling properly instead of commando style. It was as if after 4 months of the belly slide he decided it wasn't cutting it anymore. Who knows what propels a kid to change after so much time... Anyways, he's almost as fast as Missy now which makes for really fun games of chase. He crawls after her and tries to bite her as she squeals and crawls away. They really make each other laugh now. She, on the other hand, is getting close to walking. She uses the toy walker we bought for LR that he never used as a walker. She loves it and just needs to learn how to turn it. For now, she goes as far across the room as she can and then turns to smile and collect accolades.

Yes, They Can Can Can!

LR

1. can swear! He said, "oh dammit" to me the other day. I explained we don't use those words to which he countered, "why?" "Um, well... dammit, I can't think of a reason." :)
2. can spell his name. He surprised me with that the other day. Maybe they're working on it in school...
3. can have an entire play date without any screaming, fighting, or tears!
4. has started using phrases like "it's not fair," and "that's not funny, Daddy." Ah preschool.
   

Missy

1. can pull herself up to a standing position and then let go with one hand, sometimes even both. She'll hover for a moment before sitting down. She practices standing by herself a couple of times each day now.
   
2. makes a break for the bathroom every time someone opens the door. She loves playing with swinging doors.
3. dances whenever she hears music by bouncing up and down.
4. waves both arms when she's happy.
5. can climb up the entire staircase on her own. (Don't worry, Daddy was behind her the whole way.)
   

J Frog

1. always gets his fingers pinched or smashed by siblings or toys.
2. follows every bite of food with a couple of fingers or his whole fist, making all mealtimes incredible messes.
3. can get his knees under him when crawling now, but for any distances, he reverts to commando crawling.
4. can go to anyone. As long as someone is cuddling him, he doesn't mind who it is.
5. can pull himself up, but sometimes gets stuck standing and doesn't know how to get back down. (We went through this a month ago with Missy. Here we go again.)
   

Parenting Styles

Clearly Daddy and I have different parenting styles, but never was it more clear than the other night during bath time. Because the babies tend to bathe right after dinner, I'm usually the one to give them their bath. Even if Daddy is home, he's occupied by LR who by that time of day is frantic for a dedicated playmate.

Well, the other night, Daddy was giving them a bath while I tried to sort out the growing problem of keeping the babies clothes organized. (It's not a real problem until I send Daddy up to get them clothes and he comes down with wrong sizes or clothes for the wrong season.) While sorting I heard some screaming, so I went in to check. I think I asked nicely, but it probably sounded something like, "what the hell?" (That is nicely at the end of our days.) Daddy explained that he had been conducting an experiment where he had them fight over a washcloth, thus the intermittent screaming.

"Why not give them each a washcloth," I exclaimed. See, I give them each a clean washcloth for them to chew on / suck the water out of. Everyone's happy. No screaming. But Daddy thinks that the twins are for his entertainment and he's got a ring-side seat. He said that Missy yelled every time J Frog took the washcloth and after a couple of times, she would turn to look at Daddy and yell at him as if to say, "will you please do something about this hooligan?"

Fascinating, Daddy.

Twin Toys!

I never use those IM shortcuts. I'm an ex-English teacher and when I IM, I feel embarrassed if I use "LOL," "TTYL," or, god forbid, "UR" instead of "your" or "you are." So, I'm old. It probably has nothing to do with the English teacher bit. That being said, OMG OMG OMG, take a look at this:
Can you believe they make a twin trike? It's awesome! As soon as they are beyond the hair pulling stage, I am putting them on this thing, running a rope from the handlebar to LR's waist, and letting him drag them all over the house. I happened upon a list that another mother of twins posted on her blog. It's a huge list of quality kids toys and I was just skimming it when I saw the word "twins." I clicked on the link and the clouds parted over my monitor. A bright ray of light emerged as I realized that there might be twin specific toys out there. Now I'm on the hunt. Will keep you posted on what I find!

Sick sick sick (and sick)

The night after Halloween LR came down with a nasty bug. The fever lasted 2 days and the runny nose, scratchy throat, and cough are still there. Then Missy caught it which wasn't a surprise since she's his favorite. I think he prefers her because she interacts with him more than J Frog does, but Abra also seems to prefer her which may be instigating the lopsided attention he gives her. She loves to laugh and LR loves making her laugh. Daddy compensates by lavishing attention on J Frog. (I'm hesitant to write about this for fear that J Frog will read it some day and think he wasn't loved as much. Not so. LR just doesn't like that J Frog is always after his Hotwheels.) So, as I said, no surprise that she got it next. Once her fever stopped, J Frog's started. Daddy's started at about that time as well. Daddy seems to have gotten it worst of all. He took off Thu. and Fri. from work and for those of you who know him, that's a pretty big deal. He's not getting much time to recover at night either since the kids have been up and down a lot.

Speaking of preferences, the babies have started getting really irritated if I pick up one and not the other. I will nurse one while Abra holds the other one who is typically starting at me and screaming/crying. She tries to distract them or take them to another room, but if they're tired, forget about it. So I nurse one and feel guilty about the other one. Or hold one and feel guilty. Or play with one and feel guilty. Anyone want to start counting days until I crash and burn?

In other news, Abra has decided to spend her second year in the US with another family. The looming winter has sent her in search of warmer waters. We have started our search for a new au pair and as painful as it will be to lose Abra, we're looking forward to finding another person with which to share our hell joy.

Halloween '08

Halloween this year took lots of preparation. First Abra and Daddy found costumes for the babies at the Mother of Twins sale in Sept. They found matching pumpkin costumes, but decided not to go the matchy-matchy route. I thought that was a good decision. Then LR and I practiced the door routine for 2 weeks prior to Halloween. I would put him in the garage, have him knock on the door with pumpkin bucket in hand and say "Trick or Treat" when I opened the door. At one point I said, "say, 'trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat.'" He looked at me sternly and said, "that's not nice." And there you have it - spontaneous moral judgements. Hooray... not only can I feel like a bad mom, he can tell me when I'm being one. Coolio.

So, the day of, I had LR try on all the costumes available to him. My clown costume from when I was his age. His elephant costume from last year. And finally the fireman costume I picked out over the summer - it was a raincoat from Costco which he needed anyway, but doubled as a costume really nicely! Red pants, black shirt, rubber boots and we were ready to go. Well, with child #1.

The babies got baths before we put them in costume so that they could go right to bed when we got home. Abra was intent on being a witch and was really curious about the holiday. She came with us as with toured the neighborhood and helped coach LR at the doors. All that practicing was for naught. Every time someone came to the door with a heaping bowl of candy, his eyes opened wide and he lost the power of speech, struck dumb by the sheer volume of sugar. We would all stand there saying, "what do you say? what do you say?" and eventually, LR would recover and squeak out, "trick or treat," sometimes before sometimes after grabbing a candy bar. Then we'd have to remind him to say thank you. He was also really interested in the other kids out and about and insisted that crowded doorsteps were "parties." I can see how it would look that way.

LR was a little disappointed in only getting 1 piece of candy when we got home. To be honest, I was too - gorging on candy is definitely a favorite Halloween memory, but I guess when he's older.


Getting J Frog ready







Getting Missy ready









Babies are ready to go!












LR standing in the kitchen waiting for the rest of us to get our act together.











We made it out the door! We're standing in our yard, cracking our glow sticks, and posing for one last picture.






Ohhhhh ahhhh.... glow sticks!







LR trick or treating







Back home with his loot. Making a face because I'm making him pose for another damn picture.







The day before Halloween making spider cupcakes with Cheerio eyes. Pretty fun.






Too small elephant costume, but fun to run around in for a little while.











LR with a little bit of self-applied face paint wearing the clown costume Grandma W made for SwingDaddy and I when we were little.

Little Rugger In Training

I took LR to the last 2 rugby practices. He wanted to join in all their activities and they were more than grateful for the distraction. He jumped right in to the stretching at the beginning of practice. They instructed him on how to touch his toes. After trying for a while he announced, "my legs are too short" which made everyone laugh. I had more than one player come up to tell me how cute he was and how well spoken. Sometimes I forget how nice it is to have a kid with strong verbal skills. His favorite word game now is to match words that he thinks sound alike. Last night I served spinach. He said, "spinach, like 'spin.'" And then he said, "spinach, like 'itch.'" Right. spin + itch = spinach. Makes sense.

At the second practice he came to, he hoped into the end of the line of rookies marching for initiation. He was like the smallest elephant in the line in The Jungle Book. He mimicked everything they did. It was adorable. They couldn't get enough and I hope next year he can come with me to more practices. You can't tell from the pictures, but he's wearing a large sweatshirt from Gigi which says, "Rugger in training." The team really appreciated that and were more than willing to practice lifting him in a line and throw a ball with him. While we sat in a circle discussing the history of initiation, he tackled everyone by running into them and pushing them over. Cute at practice. Not cute with the babies. Let's hope he can make the distinction.

9 Month Checkup

Check out her shiner! This picture was taken about 3 days after the initial injury, so it was already fairly well healed. The black eye was terribly cute.

The babies had their 9 month checkup last week. Missy is 19 lbs. 9 oz. while J Frog is 18 lbs. 13 oz. She is 27.75 and he is 28.5 inches. They both got flu shots, but recovered fast thanks to each having a cookie to gnaw on. They were supposed to get the lead and hemoglobin tests done, but there was an emergency in the office and the nurse who was supposed to draw their blood was occupied. Eventually we had to leave to pick up LR from preschool. I'm debating whether or not to go back to get those done. We live in a house that is 10 years old and I know they're getting enough iron in their diet. Is it worth the finger stick? Probably, but it's so much tougher to get twins geared up to go anywhere that I'm reluctant to do it.

J Frog has started to pull up. He typically finds Missy and drags himself up right next to her. Unfortunately, he's even more unstable than when Missy started pulling herself up, so he's falling over a lot. The best is when they stand on opposite sides of LR's learning tower and play peek-a-boo. They seem to be much more entertained by each other now... in the bath, while playing, during meal times. I have some adorable video of them laughing at each other while standing at the tower. I'll try to get that movie up soon.

Missy's First Tooth

Gummy Sue no longer! Last Friday Missy started putting her whole fist in her mouth and Abra thought she might be teething. By Saturday morning there was a red bump on her lower gum with a white line underneath. On Monday morning it finally broke through. Missy has her first tooth! I thought LR got his first tooth way earlier, but when I looked back in the blog I found that LR got his first around 7 months. J Frog got his at 8 months and now Missy at 9 months, so they're not really that far apart.

Cousin's Wedding

We finally took the plunge and took the whole family out of the state. Luckily that meant traveling only 2 hours by car to a country club just outside Hartford, CT. But, we are adventurers nonetheless. I spent 2 nights the previous week preparing for the event by hitting the mall for outfits for everyone. The kids had nothing but play clothes, so I finally used some of the Baby Gap gift certificates for them. No dress for Missy! They had beautiful ones, but she's just at that stage where she's crawling but not walking and that makes dresses impossible.

The day started well. We loaded up the minivan - really loaded it up. Daddy asked if we were going on safari. We were clearly over prepared, but better that than showing up with no diapers or some other necessity like that. LR started out watching a Thomas the Train adventure on the DVD player, but quickly focused on all the cars and trucks on the road. They were much more interesting to him. He chatted away with Abra in the back and the babies took their morning naps in their car seats. Missy passed out right away while J Frog waited until almost the end.

We skipped the actual wedding since there was the potential for the kids to destroy the audio recording they were making of the service. That worked just fine for us since the reception was a much easier place for LR to be. We had just a few minutes to say our hello's to Daddy's family before the lunch service began. We took our seats and thanks to cookies being on the table and hot rolls and fruit bowls to begin the meal, LR was incredibly well behaved. He is a typical 3 year-old, so for him to sit through that meal and chat with the people around the table was awesome. J Frog and Missy ate the lunch we brought for them and J Frog really dug into one of the apples on the table. He screamed whenever Abra tried to take it away, so she just let him gnaw his little heart out. Yianni and Cookie spirited away Missy and J Frog for a little while and that was a really nice break for us. Even stranger-fear didn't keep Missy from socializing.

Right after lunch LR found a playmate! His second cousins M and I are 4 and 2 years-old respectively and they played chase for at least an hour. It was great to have so many family members around to keep an eye on them as they ran the loop through the dance floor, in front of the bar and around the tables. They also joined in the circle dances and entertained the crowd. They also decided that I was a maypole at one point and ran around and around. It made me dizzy to watch them.

At the end of the reception, we had a decision to make. We could either pack them up and feed them dinner in their car seats, potentially ruining their bedtime by making them sleep early, or go hang out in Yianni and Cookie's hotel room for an hour, change clothes, get the kids into pjs and head back right at their bedtime. We chose the latter thinking that they would fall asleep in their seats and we'd just transfer them to cribs when we got home. Yeah... well, it didn't go that smoothly. The extra visiting time at the hotel was great, but there was lots of screaming on the ride home - Missy for awhile, then she conked out, then J Frog for a long time. We had to stop for me to nurse them again, so the ride home took 3 hours instead of 2. Everyone was completely exhausted when we pulled in around 9pm. Since then J Frog has been ultra resistant to going in the car seat, so I think he's having flashbacks.

Missy loved playing peek-a-boo from behind the table chairs. She practiced standing up and sitting down over and over again. She no longer gets stuck standing up!





M and LR dancing with the Daddy's aunt and uncle, M's grandparents.






More dancing!









Maypole time












Steppie and LR cuddle. Awww

Visit from Uncle T and Aunt E

A couple of weekends ago we had a great visit from my Uncle T and Aunt E. They live in NY, so we don't see them as often as we'd like now that we're more housebound, but it's great when they stop by to visit.

Missy didn't seem to have much trouble warming up to them although she's still suffering from some stranger fear. I think it may be morphing into a bit of separation anxiety too. She and J Frog both hate when Abra or I leave the room. Maybe it's because J Frog has started using Missy as a step stool. Another blogging friend of mine mentioned in her last comment that her twins did the same thing. As if by magic, within days of that post, J Frog started using Missy to pull himself up. Boy does she scream when he does that!

LR loved having new people to play with and really enjoyed (and is still enjoying) the 2 new Leo Lionni books they brought for him. We already had "Let's Make Rabbits" and now we read "Inch By Inch" and "Frederick" often during the bedtime routine. I think "Frederick" is his favorite. They also arrived with awesome brown corduroy overalls for the babies. They're perfect for this chilly fall weather and they've already worn them a bunch of times. You can see them wearing them in the pictures too.

Oh, and Missy has her first shiner. I should've taken a picture of it, but now it's almost healed. She pulled herself up on a chair and then pulled the chair over onto her face. It bashed her right across the eye and I was definitely in let's-get-to-the-ER mode, but once she stopped screaming, I could see that her eye was okay. She has a huge bruise below her eye and a tiny cut on her eyelid. She looks just like some of my rugby players. Thank goodness she held off on doing that until after we came back from a family wedding last weekend. So no more letting Missy crawl out of sight as long as I haven't nailed down everything.

We did manage to get out to get pumpkins, but they didn't have the bouncy castle at the patch that they had last year. I had promised it to LR and he was pretty disappointed. Without that distraction, it wasn't as fun to haul the kids around the palettes of pumpkins trying to pick out one for each of us. The double wagon came in handy as a pumpkin hauler though when J Frog decided he'd had enough of riding. That kid just can't be held enough! Such a cuddler.

Twin Sale

So, twice a year the Massachusetts Mother's of Twins Association puts on a sale of all the members' crap. It's pretty amazing and luckily they hold the sale in our town's high school cafeteria. Two Saturdays ago I sent Daddy with Abra to the sale to see what they could find for Missy for winter clothes. We have enough hand-me-downs for J Frog from LR, so he's okay, but we are obviously limited in girl clothing. They came home with 2 garbage bags full with clothes. I don't think there's any way Missy will even wear it all before she grows out of it. Abra said she'd be playing a lot of dress-up with Missy. I have to admit that after almost a lifetime of jeans and t-shirts, pink, ruffle-y girls clothes are really cute.

About a week and a half ago, Missy started pulling herself up to a standing position. Now she's starting to cruise. She also tried to climb the stairs. I came around the corner a few days ago and she had her hands on the second stair and her knees on the first stair. She's killing me. Daddy pulled the gate out of the basement that night and put it up. It's been down for a year and those were good times. It's a pain to have to go through a gate and both the top and bottom of the stairs, but I'll get used to it. Safety first! So no more dresses for Missy for the time being. Between the crawling and the climbing, there's no place for them.

For a few days J Frog was content to crawl over to Missy and pull her legs out from under her while she was trying to stand. This seems to be a problem that is unique to twins. I don't think I'd have this problem if it were just LR and Missy, but J Frog was intent on grabbing whatever leg was closer and chewing on her pant leg. Plus, he has sharp little teeth! Just in the past few days, he's started to show signs of pulling up. I lowered his mattress since he was hanging over the bar every time Abra or I went in to get him. Missy, however, cries herself to sleep while standing since she can't figure out how to get down. She learned how to get up so fast that I'm not too worried about her learning how to bend those knees. It's the imminent walking that I'm worried about!

Holy Crow!

Disclaimer: Pictures are random for this post - leftovers from various occasions.

So when Daddy and I decided to have kids, we tried to clean up our language. Years of involvement with the rugby community had us swearing slightly more than a middle schooler. So, when LR was born, we tried to use variations to keep it clean. I know I shouldn't use anything, but trust me, with 3 kids under 3, swearing is one of the smaller battles. As a result, LR's favorite new expression is "Holy crow!" That particular expression is courtesy of my step-father who used that as his clean version of swearing when we were kids. And the circle of life continues...

At first I was a little concerned about LR using phrases like the above in his new preschool, but I've come to find out that his classroom has bigger battles too. I've already blogged about his first day where he had a discipline issue, but I've found out that every day since school started, he's been sent to the office at least once for anything from throwing sand to not sitting still in the reading circle - He's 3! Not sitting still is an infraction worthy of a visit to the office? I get the throwing sand one, but sitting still?

So, I started to get concerned. I mentioned it to another mom the second week of school, unaware that she is also a VP on the board of the school. The next week she asked me how it was going and I said, "not so well... maybe it's not the right place for him." She said, "no, I was the parent helper yesterday and LR is clearly being singled out by the teacher. When all the kids are mauling each other in the reading circle, LR is the one who gets called out. It's her first year teaching and she doesn't have the skills to deal with anything other than all the kids sitting quietly at the same time. I'm thinking of taking my son out since even though it's LR this week, it could be my son next week." Well, shit. Sorry,... shiz-nit. She's on the board and she's serious about taking her son out of the school because of the quality of the teacher. She's been calling around to other schools since the first week. My guess is that LR was unaware of the expectations the first week, broke the "rules," and was identified as a hot spot by the teacher.

Now, I've been a first year teacher and I know how hard it is, but as a parent, I'm pretty furious about my 3 year-old being singled out as a trouble maker. When I ask him about his day, he tells me he was "bad." He's not a bad kid! He's high-energy, but incredibly loving for his age. All he wants to do is play with the other kids. He lights up when I tell him it's a school day. The last thing I want to have happen is to have him stop liking school because he gets in trouble every day for being 3. So, the VP on the board went and spoke with the principal and set up a plan for the principal to observe LR's teacher every week. Then I called the principal to set up a meeting and tomorrow I have to go in during my work hours to meet with LR's teacher and the principal. The principal asked me to come in with suggestions for the teacher for instructing LR. Really?

On one hand, I understand that she thinks I have insight for dealing with LR, but on the other, I have no idea how to handle his behavior when he's with 12 other children that he'd obviously rather pay attention to than any adult. Isn't that what preschool teachers specialize in? How do I go to this meeting without being angry that she's punishing my child unfairly and letting that come through in the conversation? I want to make sure he has a good year, but I also need to remove him from the school if this is going to continue. I fiercely want to protect LR without going all "crazy-change-my-kid's-F-to-an-A-momma" on her. Know what I mean?

The only good news is the confirmation from a third party that LR is being completely normal in the classroom and not doing anything unusual for his age. That confirmation helped make last week much more fun at home since I didn't feel like I had to sit on him to make him behave.

LR's Recent Observations

While reading a book where a boat is being loaded by trucks, "Daddy, that's not cargo. It's truck-go."

Trying to repeat mommy's stellar pronunciation of the word "burritos" with the whole rolled r thing, "Boobies!" (Honestly, it's not a word that he'd ever heard before, but when I'd finished laughing, you better believe he added it to his repertoire.)

After spinning in circles, "Mommy, my house is moving."

Visit from Grandma Nese

Grandma Nese was kind enough to join us for the second week of Abra's trip. That way Daddy could go back to work and I wouldn't go crazy. Nobody likes a crazy Mommy... least of all Mommy. We tried to pack a couple of adventures into the trip, but the favorite was the trip to the Children's Museum downtown. LR went straight to the boat room and he and Grandma Nese played for a while with the boats and the water spigots that control the water flow. It took some convincing to go anywhere else in the museum, but we finally got him to go to the construction room. The museum was pretty empty, so we just let LR have the run of the place while we gave bottles to the babies.

Missy and J Frog have gotten good at eating for the most part. It's yogurt for breakfast and cereal with applesauce for lunch. For dinner we try to sneak in a vegetable and often give them some teething toast. They love the toast, but oh, the mess! Little soggy crumbles end up on their clothes, the chairs, their hair, the floor, my shirt, their trays, and the table. Good thing bath time is always right after dinner. Trying to clean them up any other way would just be a mistake.







LR drives a grocery delivery truck at the museum.







Grandma Nese gets used to the big stroller.












J Frog's preferred method of drinking water. He really doesn't dig sippy cups. Instead he takes big mouthfuls of water and chokes on every fifth sip or so. Doesn't keep him from going back for more though!




Grandma Nese tries to keep the babies on the blanket and grass out of their mouths during a birthday party for LR's friend. They were ALL about the grass.









Yum yum!







It's all mine!